


Caring

by crystalredlove



Series: So Kiss Me (ChanHan/BangHan/Bang Chan x Jisung one shots) [2]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Chan and Jisung don't have enough stories, Chan's a sub, Domdrop, Fluff, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Jisung is a soft dom, Light Angst, M/M, Mentions of Sex, Mild subdrop, Punishment, Safeword Use, Safewords, kinda spicy at the start, no actual sex takes place, not actually graphic in violence but just in case ya know, not proof read we die like men, slapping of the butt, they love each other so much it's sickening, they try something new
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-21
Updated: 2020-10-21
Packaged: 2021-03-09 06:13:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27139195
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crystalredlove/pseuds/crystalredlove
Summary: Chan suggests something new, and Jisung tries for him. He really does.
Relationships: Bang Chan/Han Jisung | Han
Series: So Kiss Me (ChanHan/BangHan/Bang Chan x Jisung one shots) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1980230
Comments: 6
Kudos: 115





	Caring

**Author's Note:**

> Edit: 11/02/20
> 
> (I do take writing requests, so if you have specific prompts you'd wanna see, I can definitely do that for you! ❤️
> 
> If anyone wants to donate to me if they can, it'd be pretty cool- my work place doesn't give me a lot of hours, and I'm struggling 😭 doesn't have to be a lot, any amount would be very much appreciated!! 
> 
> Cash app - $Clairety  
> Ko-fi: Ko-fi.com/claire97)

"You couldn't just follow a simple instruction, Channie."

Jisung's words were gentle, but the tone carried was mean. It sent shudders down his spine. Chan hadn't meant to come, he really didn't. But Jisung had edged him on for too long, he couldn't hold back even if he wanted to. He wanted to be a good boy. Jisung just made it too hard.

"'m sorry, sungie" Chan slurred, shaking his head when he felt himself fall deeper into his subspace. 

It was his first time being a hard dom. Jisung always preferred to being a soft, sweet dom. Always showering Chan with praise and love, making sure Chan was okay and never under any sort of pain. Then one day, the older had gone to him, phone in hand, and said _"How do you feel about punishment?" Jisung was shocked, to say the least. "I- I don't know?"_

They talked it out, and Jisung was even more surprised to see how much Chan really wanted to try it out. Was he not enough? Did Chan not feel satisfied? 

These questions bugged Jisung for a bit. Yeah, Chan reassured him that it was just something he wanted to try, but the insecurities implanted themselves deep into his brain.

Chan's really enjoying himself, Jisung noticed as Chan lay beneath him, limp and compliant. Without another thought, he pulled Chan up by the hair and forced him onto his knees. A moan ripped out of Chan's throat and Jisung felt a strange tug at his heart. His eyes scanned Chan's body, taking in all the hickeys and the bright red slap mark on his face. 

Chan really likes this, but Jisung isn't so sure he himself does.

"Do you think a sorry is enough? I told you not to come, and you disobeyed me." Another slap to Chan's face. He cried out in pain, and Jisung hated it. 

"Channie, what's your safe word?" 

"Traffic light system. Green good, yellow slow down, red stop."

"Good boy."

Of course a safe word was discussed for Chan. It never crossed their minds that Jisung might need it, too.

He doesn't like hurting Chan. It makes him feel like shit. 

"I'll do anything you want, Sungie!" Chan said, a sob ripping through him. Alarm rang through Jisung's mind, afraid that he had gone too far. "Babe, color?"

"Green, sungie. Feels so good."

His heart dropped. Chan wants to keep going.

"Lay on your stomach, on my lap."

Chan obeyed, a slight tremble shooting through him. Jisung wanted to wrap Chan in a blanket and cuddle him, ensure that he knew that he loved him very much. But Chan wanted to keep going, so what Chan wants, Chan gets.

"How many slaps to your ass do you think you deserve?"

Chan noticed a shift in his tone. No longer sounding mean or in charge. He almost sounded indifferent. It struck worry in his heart. "T-Ten?" He tried, looking back at his boyfriend with mild concern. Jisung's eyes were glazed and unfocused, but the amount Chan said seemed to alleviate something in him. "Alright... Count them all. If you miss one, we're restarting."

Slap.

"Ah! O-one!"

The hits came, sharp and painful at first. Chan felt pleasure ripple through his body with each one. But by the seventh hit, Jisung started to falter. Chan felt the younger beneath him tremble. He turned to look back at him, panic shooting through him when he saw Jisung's eyes fill with tears and the look of utter disgust on his face.

"Jisung-"

Jisung couldn't hear. All that went through his head were mean and vulgar words, telling him he was cruel for hurting him.

_("Why are you hitting him."_

_"I-it's part of the act-"_

_"Are you sure? You're not acting out in some unnoticed rage?"_

_"No! I would never!"_

_"Then why are you hurting him?"_

_"He wanted to give it a try!"_

_"Maybe he's bored of your vanilla ways. Or maybe he thinks you're bored, and he's forcing himself to go along with it because he thinks you like it."_

_"N-no, he'd safe word"_

_"Cruel. Pathetic. Evil. He's only ever treated you with kindness, and this is how you thank him. By hurting him."_

_"STOP!")_

"Hyung I'm sorry, but red."

Chan didn't expect that. He got off his lap and pulled Jisung into a tight hug, the younger wasting no time into hugging back. He felt Jisung's body shake as he tried to contain his cries. "Sungie, tell me what's wrong?" Chan coaxed gently, running a hand through his hair. 

"I-I can't keep doing it, Channie-hyung." 

Jisung couldn't do what Chan wanted. Couldn't be harsh when he needed. He's useless. Pathetic excuse of a dom. 

"Jisung, look at me." 

He couldn't bring himself to look at him, only burried his face into his Hyung's broad shoulder. "I hate seeing you in pain. I know we consented, but I don't like hurting you. I don't like causing any form of pain on you, makes me feel horrible." His voice was thick and muffled. Chan's heart melted, but the worry didn't go away. Jisung continued, "makes me feel like a bad person. I know we talked about it, I just- I'm sorry if I'm disappointing, but I don't want to..."

"Babe, no-!" He pulled back a bit and cupped Jisung's tear stained face with his hands. "If you didn't like it, we don't have to do it. It was something I just wanted to try, and it's no fun if both of us aren't enjoying it, right?" He kissed at the stray tears, eliciting a soft giggle from Jisung. "I'm glad you said red when you did. I'm sorry we didn't talk about a safeword for you." He muttered as he pressed his forehead against Jisung's, wrapping his arms over his shoulders. "Traffic system work for you, too?"

Jisung nodded, pulling Chan closer by the waist. "Yeah, it's fine~"

The guilt didn't necessarily fade off already. Jisung could still see the bruises he had left. "Alright Channie-hyung, let's get you ready for a bath, yeah?"

Chan knew this is what Jisung liked to do. Liked to take care of him with praise, and soft actions. He liked preparing a bath, ordering Chan's favorite food, and putting his favorite movie as they cuddled and fed each other. So, Chan let him, knowing this is what Sungie needed to calm down from what seemed to be a form of dom drop. 

Dom drop.

It's rare, for him at least, when doms go through a drop. Never in a million years did he think his Jisung would go through it. And his heart ached for him.

"Do you want your bathbomb, darling?"

"Y-yeah, the vanilla scented one, please."

Chan watched him, eyes hardening just a bit at the sight of Jisung's shaky figure. He feels bad, for making Jisung do that. For putting him in a position like that. 

Jisung's not cold, or mean. He's sweet, warm, tender, and oh so loving. He wouldn't want him to change for anything or anyone.

"Okay, come on."

Jisung carried Chan into the warm water, and Chan let out a soft sigh.

"I'll be right back hyung, I'm gonna put in an order for food."

Jisung scurried out the bathroom, leaving Chan to think over what happened in the bed room.

When they talked about it, Jisung was slightly hesitant. Chan should have taken that as a sign. But he was more than willing once he had seen Chan was excited to try it. Even during the scene itself, Chan couldn't even tell if Jisung was enjoying himself. He was wrapped up in his own pleasure to think about Jisung, and he began to feel like crap. "Sungie, I'm so sorry..." He muttered to himself, suddenly wishing for the water to engulf him completely. 

Jisung had mentioned before that he wasn't fond of being mean during sex, said the idea alone made him feel nasty. How could he have dismissed it like that?

"Channie-hyung, I'm back~" Jisung returned, stripped of his clothes, and wasted no time in joining Chan in the bath. Chan instinctively leaned back against his chest, enjoying his boyfriend's presence. Jisung no longer seemed tense, now that he was in a comfortable space. He hummed a random tune as he washed Chan's hair, his actions soft as to make sure Chan was okay and safe. "Tilt your head back, hyungie."

Chan let the younger do as he pleased. "Thank you, Sungie."

Once the shampoo was rinsed off Chan's hair, he moved on to washing his body. Chan watched as Jisung's hands handled him with so much care. He wanted to apologize, but he remained silent for the time being.

\----

They sat in the living room, noodles laid out on their table as A Series of Unfortunate Events played as background noise. Jisung's hand intertwined with Chan's tiny ones, and the older felt guilt hit him once again "Sungie..." He muttered, his eyes hyperfocused on the screen, in which Count Olaf left the kids at the train tracks.

"What's up?" Jisung pulled Chan closer, and Chan let himself melt into his embrace. "I'm sorry about tonight." He started. Jisung remained silent, knowing Chan needed to talk out what was in his head. "I thought this would be fun for us to try. Something new. But not because I was bored, or because I thought you were bored. Just to see if it was something we could both enjoy. A-at first, I did..." His gazed shifted to their hands. "But when you called out red, I realized I was being selfish. I should have been paying attention to you as well. I don't think you even got hard once. I'm sorry." He finished, tears coming to his eyes. Jisung pressed a kiss to his cheek. "Chan, don't apologize. I was looking forward to it, I wanted to see if I could push myself out of my comfort zone. And it worked for a while, but then I started to be aware of how hard I'd hurt you, and it made me feel a little bad." Jisung tensed around Chan, alarming the poor man. "My question is, do you like it?"

"Not if you don't." Chan was quick to turn to face him properly, cupping his face in his hands once more. "Don't- you don't have to force yourself to like something because you think I like it. I don't need you to do any of that, when I love how caring you are. How sweet you look out for me, how tender you are..." He kissed Jisung on the lips when he saw the younger's eyes swell with tears. "I love you, and the you that comes out in bed. I wouldn't want you to change from that."

Chan's words made Jisung cry harder than he wanted to admit. He pulled Chan into a hug, muttering about how he hated inflicting pain on him. Chan said nothing as he let his boyfriend cry it out. "I'm sorry."

Once the tears stopped, Chan grabbed both of Jisung's hands. "We can work on communication skills more. If I suggest something that makes you feel uneasy, please don't hesitate to let me know. And same goes for me. And as for safe words, we'll both go by the color system. Yeah?"

Jisung nodded. "Sounds good, hyung. Thank you."

The rest of the night went smoothly. They ate, talked about each other's day, and made plans for the next day (a simple lunch date before Chan went to work and Jisung threw himself into his studies). They fell asleep on the couch, too comfortable to leave their little blanket nest. 

Mistakes are gonna be made, even if they don't seem big. But they know they would get through it, as long as they had each other.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


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